Ways to Find Positivity While Grieving

“What we once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” —HELEN KELLER

Grieving the loss of a loved one can be an incredibly difficult process. For some people, the grieving process can be overwhelming and seem never-ending. People can also grieve the loss of a job, a divorce or relationship, the loss of a pet, etc. In this post, I will be focusing mainly on the loss of a loved one, but certainly, some of these methods can be applied to other types of loss.

Never. We never lose our loved ones. They accompany us; they don’t disappear from our lives. We are merely in different rooms. —-PAULO COELHO

It’s hard to find that positive outlook while in the midst of mourning, however, it’s not impossible. If you are willing to look a little closer, the glimmer of a brighter day is always there waiting for you to find it.

As humans, we are designed to feel. We feel pain, joy, love, fear, happiness, anger, sadness and every emotion in between. Grief is often considered one of the most difficult emotions to cope with. However, grief is a necessary part of healing.

It is possible to find moments of happiness and contentment, even in the midst of sadness. I’m not talking about “good vibes only” and “fake it ‘til you make it” mentality.

Embracing grief and going through the emotions are healthy and necessary to heal…but what if there are other ways to experience grief? What if we could still feel a bit of happiness and connected to those we love, even while we are grieving? Here are some ways to help you find some positivity while grieving.

1. Give Yourself Permission to Have Moments of Joy

It’s absolutely ok to enjoy moments of happy, laughter, etc. Grief and times of happiness can co-exist and is human nature.

I came across something that really resonated with me and hopefully, it helps you as well…

“Your loved one’s memory does not live in the pain of your grief. It lives in the stories that you tell people about your loved one. It lives in the memories you share together with friends and family. It lives in the things you do that your loved one taught you. It lives in the things you do in their honor and memory. It lives in every silly little thing you do to stay connected to them—from taking photographs, to listening to music they loved, to baking their favorite cake, to whatever other thing you do to continue bonds.” UNDERSTANDING GRIEF : LITSA WILLIAMS

2. Try Honoring Your Loved One Through Your Own Life.

Put in that extra effort, go that extra mile in things that you do and honor your loved one while you put your intention forth.

• Explore something or finish a project off of your loved one’s bucket list.
• Light a candle in their memory.
• Sponsor a bench or a brick at their favorite place or park.
• Volunteer for one of your loved one’s favorite charity.
• I, personally, get a picture of my dad and put near our table at Thanksgiving so you could put a pic of your loved one nearby at holidays.
• Make or have someone make a blanket or teddy bear out of your loved one’s favorite shirts.
• Plant a tree in memory of your loved one.

3. Join The Dinner Party

If your age range is 21-45 years old, The Dinner Party might be a good fit for you. It is a community for people who have experienced loss of a loved one. You can be part of a group connection or a one to one connection.

Thedinnerparty.org

Grieving.com is another excellent site for all ages. It has a variety of forums so people can share their experiences and connect with others so can relate to what they are going through.

4. Write Letters to Your Loved One.

Some people say that writing letters to their loved one can help.

According to Harvard Health, research has shown that writing about intense emotions can help us with coping with the grieving process. Writing helps to get these feelings from inside onto paper helping to release stress.

Take your time and consider reflecting with honesty and acceptance. Some ideas you can talk to your loved one about are your feelings, your love for them, your current experiences, what you appreciate in life, what you are learning about yourself as you grieve, etc.

5. Celebrate Life…When You Feel Like It.

Bake a cake in their honor and donate it. Bringing a smile to someone else can be helpful in healing.

Have some fun and let your inner child come out! Sing your favorite song, play in the rain, play with pets, run and laugh, play in the snow, kick a ball around, etc.

6. Talk With Someone About Your Grief

Talking with someone about your grief with a professional or a friend can help tremendously.

Often times these conversations can explore into subjects that make you laugh or smile. By sharing your emotions, it can clear a path to help you move through your sadness to see glimmers of positivity.

7. Try Gratitude

Take note of your life in the current moment. Even though you are experiencing an incredible pain, notice little bits of life you are grateful for…keep it simple though. This can help to rebalance a little. The more you do it, the more habitual it will become.

8. Use Affirmations

I talk about affirmations in some of my other posts. An affirmation is a statement that when repeated can create a more positive mindset. These statements can reach your subconscious mind to motivate, re-power, and help calm your emotions.

Here are some affirmations to help you during the grieving process:

I will be gentle with myself while I am grieving.

I choose to feel hopeful today.

I can cope with my grief.

I can honor and feel connected with my loved one by spreading love and positivity as I continue to turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones.

I am never alone and I continue to heal.

I can live and live well today.

My heart can bare all my feelings. It’s ok to grieve my loved one and find joy in my life at the same time.

I give myself care, patience, and time. I allow myself sleep and time for renewal.

I am fully present at this moment.

I choose professional help if I need it.

I am grateful.

For more affirmations, consider checking out Louise Hay and healyourlife.com.

“There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart.” — MAHATMA GANDHI

Another way to help you in the grieving process is to look to your faith. Consider giving all your worries to God or your specific higher power. You can turn it into an affirmation.

Today I give all my worries to God or my higher power.

There is no wrong way to find positivity while grieving. Grief is a unique and personal experience. I hope these tips in this post will provide some guidance. The important thing is to not allow your grief to stop you from living life, even if it feels impossible at times. There is no right or wrong way to grieve; everyone experiences loss differently. What has helped you during the grieving process? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below.

Remember, You are important, you have purpose, and you matter!

Peace and love, Jende💖

References: Verywellmind.com; Buschcares.com; Thedinnerparty.org; Buzzfeed.com; Joincake.com; Succesconsciousness.com; Healingbrave.com; Healyourlife.com; Evrmrmories.com; Goalcast.com